Dear Horatio
by InkNerd
Summary: Drabbles in which James Kirk writes to "Horatio" for advice or wisdom on a variety of topics. Mostly humorous, slightly angsty, a dash of hurt/comfort, and of course a bit of romance.
1. Dear Horatio

_Dear Horatio,_

_I don't really know what to do here since this is my first time to write to someone for advice rather than figuring it out on my own. I suppose all the pestering from my friends, who have been telling me to write to you since they learned of why I need to write to you, finally paid off in a way. For me, it feels rather awkward to be asking "love" advice from a male persona. Not that you don't give excellent advice, because I do read your column and know that you know what you are talking about._

_Let me also say that this is new for me. The whole "love" thing. I learned long ago that if you love someone, then they will leave. I learned not to get close to someone because they get hurt and leave. I've always left a person when I've felt like things are going to far down the road toward those leaving and hurt stages. If that makes me a bad person, so be it._

_However, I met this man..."Mick" a few years ago when we both joined a program together. Though it was a slow process, we actually became best friends. I know that you are probably rolling your eyes at the cliche of the "best friend love story" but I couldn't help myself. There was just something about him that made me want to stick around. Made me want to improve my life, which was just a few shots and bar fights short of ending up six feet under._

_I've never felt like this before in my life. Not only do I want him, no...need him, but I know that it's more than just physical attraction. My seldom there mother told me once on a rare occasion that she actually wanted to see me that true love was wanting and doing what was best for the other, doing what made the other happy. Well, I want what is best for Mick; I want to do what is best for him; and above all, I want him to be happy. If that means that I introduce him to some of my friends who would be better suited to him, and break into a million pieces, great._

_Yet, I feel as if I would regret it for the rest of my life if I didn't tell him how I felt. However, I don't know how he would take it, learning that his best friend has basically loved him since their first exchange of words on that god-forsaken shuttle. I mean I know he's dabbled around before settling down and what not, but that was a long time ago. I just don't want my friendship with him compromised because I'm acting like a "hormonal teenager"._

_That is why I am writing to you, Horatio, because I do not know what to do. I want to tell Mick how much I love him and how much he means to me, but I do not want our friendship destroyed because he doesn't feel the same for me._

_Here's to hoping you can help me out-_  
_Jeb Amius Kribers_

_PS- I love Mick VERY much and hopes he loves me back_

* * *

_Dear Jeb,_

_Thank you for your letter, and I understand how awkward it can be to write to someone like me for advice on love. Given my history, it would be laughable to many that I of all people am giving advice to people on the topic of love._

_I'm not going to lie and say your case is new, hell I get a few best friends style letters every week, all wondering the exact same thing: How do I tell my friend without ruining the friendship._  
_My answer to them all is: YOU DON'T! There is no way that the friendship is going to remain the same after a confession. The best you could hope for if "Mick" doesn't accept and return your feelings it that you'd still remain friends. Many times the friendships are utterly destroyed._

_Your mother had it right, kid. True love is wanting, and doing what is best for the one you love, even if it means leaving your little one behind. I understand that feeling to the utter most bitter end. And this Mick must be some guy for you to willingly change your life just to make it easier on him. Hope he doesn't disappoints and hurt you like you are afraid (and already admit) he will._

_But on that happy note, let me tell you something..._

_James Tiberius Kirk, you are an asshole, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I love you too, you dumbass._

_Yours Forever,_  
_Bones "Mick"Coy_

**Author's Note: I hope you all enjoy this series of letters (more en route). This was originally supposed to be a chaptered story with a good plot and everything, but I have decided to make it a drabble. I will be writing letters based on inspiration from various different places, and feel free to submit letters of your own or even a song or quote you would like to see a correspondence based on. Thanks again for reading! =)**_  
_


	2. Firework

_Dear Horatio,_

_I've been debating whether or not to write into for a long time because the nature of this is rather delicate and personal. Its the kind of personal one tells his best friend. Unfortunately, my best friend has gone through enough shit with out my baggage there to make it even worse. Hence all the debating I went through. In the end, time and your reply will tell me if I made the correct decision. _

_Anyway, I suppose you could say it all started with the fact my father died shortly after I was born, leaving my mom in a constant state of grief and sorrow especially once I started to grow up and look more and more like my father. Many therapists stated that some of my actions show that I had no father figure or whatever._

_Some more bad stuff happened to me both in my childhood and teenage years. I'd say the best thing that ever happened to me was joining StarFleet because that is where I found my best friend, and where I found a place to really...belong._

_Yet after the Narada incident, I haven't felt the same. I feel as though no one really gets it. No one understands that despite having the world at my feet, I still feel alone and just a space holder. Like I'm not as important as everyone thinks I am. _

_It's almost as if I'm a kid again, going through the same insecurities, only tenfold now that I am an adult. I feel like I'm suffocating from all the scrutiny and expectation. Expectations I know I won't always live up to, but will have to deal with the very real consequences. At times, I wonder if it's all really worth it; to put up with all that I have, only to be hit with more and more shit. _

_Sometimes I feel as though the only thing that is keeping me from totally giving up is my best friend. He can't afford to lose someone else, especially the way that I would go. He doesn't deserve it. _

_There really isn't much more to say to all of that. I summed up what's going on that I need help with, and I hope you can help me get through this rough patch with some of those very wise words of advice that I know I could use._

_Sincerely, _

_Jeb Kribers_

* * *

_Dear Jeb,_

_First, I want to thank you for writing in to my column. It shows guts and that you really do want help with what you are going through. I think you made the right choice. A third-party non-observer with no personal connections can often give a clear viewpoint. A viewpoint that could either hinder or help the situation. And I'd like to think I will help. _

_Second, I want to tell you that your best friend may understand what you're going through better than you might imagine. I'd dare say he'd have some good advice of his own to give. Never forget that there is a reason best friends are called best friends. They stick with you through thick and thin. They help you carry that burden that is too much for you to bare on your own. Never think that being alone is the best way to live...take it from someone who was once alone, it sucks. _

_Another thing, everyone has shit in their past. Yes, some have it worse than others. You can say what you want and blame who you will, but in the end it all comes down to that one life altering choice. The choice that will direct the path of the rest of your life. Sentimentalists and romantics would call it the choice of your destiny. It sounds like you made the right one. In StarFleet, you have a place to belong. You mean something and are a part of something greater than yourself. It is nice to know that you have chosen to make a difference in this world, even if it doesn't seem like it. _

_As a former First Lady of the United States said, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." You seem like a person who appears to let all that people say about him roll off but in reality it matters much more than they realize. Just remember you are your own person and they can't say anything against that. _

_You are a unique person. You matter to people. You have all that you need right inside of you. Never forget that that is all you need to prove your worth. _

_And Jim? You're a firework that lights the sky every single day._

_Sincerely,_

_Bones Horatio McCoy_

**Author's Note: I hope you all enjoy this series of letters. Feel free to submit letters of your own or even a song or quote you would like to see a correspondence based on. Thanks again for reading! =)**

**The inspiration for this one was : _Firework _by Katy Perry (it's like my new theme song)**_  
_


	3. Spock

**Author's Note: Alright! This one is a bit different than the other two. My friend **_Sechs Eins Zehn _**wrote the letter and has given me permission to post it on here, and so I will. I hope you all enjoy this one! Feel free to submit letters of your own or ideas you would like to see. Thanks for reading. REVIEWING might be nice too, no?**

* * *

_-Dear__To__For__- Dear Horatio;_

_I realize that this is completely illogical. I do not wish to write this letter, I do not wish to ask for help because I do not need help._

_Or... So I had thought I did not need help. My mind, as of late, has been... off._

_I do not know how to describe this correctly. I do not know what to think anymore, all I know that I really can think about as of the past three and a half days and six minutes is..._

_This is highly illogical._

_But I cannot stop myself from finding my mind wandering, it has become dangerous, I am having trouble doing my job correct because of my constant wandering mind._

_What I find the most illogical fact of this all, is I keep finding my mind wandering to my previous Captain._

_Captain Pike. Or Admiral Pike as I should respectfully call him now._

_Signed,_

_~Spock_

* * *

_Spock,_

_I don't think you quite understand the point of anonymity in such a format as this. Then again, a Vulcan wouldn't find the logic in trying to pussy foot around a subject. Straight and to the point, now that is logical, even if a but impractical at times. This has to be a big concern for you if you are in fact asking for the help you claim you do not need._

_Son, many think they don't need help and even claim they don't. It's a facade that is a plea in it of itself. I've seen it many times in many ways. You wanted my help but your stubborn Vulcan pride kept you from writing in. Now that, Spock, is illogical._

_Anyway on to the matter at hand, I had to read your letter a few times for you see, I'm not well versed in Vulcans expressing themselves...especially when it comes to emotions. This is an emotional matter, if I am reading correctly. Sure, your logical mind might not see it as such, but your human heart does (if you really looked deeply I think you know what I mean)._

_To be perfectly frank and honest with you, there isn't a single thing wrong with you, nor with your wandering mind. I might say that the object of the wandering isn't exactly whom I would have thought, but never mind that. It's perfectly logical that your Vulcan mind wanders to the person your human heart admires...hell, maybe even more than admire from how distracting the Admiral seems to be to you._

_In simple terms, you "like" (as in the more than mutual friendship kind of like) Admiral Pike. I wouldn't go so far as to say love, because I don't think you are at the "love" stage. Interest, attraction, slight admiration mingled with a touch of infatuation, yes._

_All I can say now is I wish you luck in perusing the Admiral, and try to be too Vulcan about it._

_Sincerely,_

_Horatio_


	4. Christmas Blues

**Author's Note: Not much to say other than this is a VERY late Christmas one...**

**PS- I had it written for New Years really. **

**PPS- Reviews are nice =)  
**

* * *

_Dear Horatio,_

_Tis the season to be jolly and joyful, to deck the halls with those boughs of holly, and to don gay apparel or so most of the songs this time of year say. But what is so great about a holiday season designed to be with loved ones, especially if your loved ones are your fellow crew mates who are going to be spending the very fortuitous shore leave to Earth with their families? _

_What happens to the the few of us who don't have families to go home to? Okay, to be honest I could go see my mother, but I'd rather not. I don't want to go into that in this letter. Anyway, I know that at the end of leave, StarFleet has a big bash, but what about the beginning? Not to mention a party like that isn't going home to familiar sounds and smells. I'm sure you understand where I am coming from with this, since you seem like the kind of person who enjoys that big family get together at Christmas._

_My...friend, Len, is one of those traditionalists when it comes to Christmas. He's also really, and I mean really, excited for this leave. It will be the first time that he will be able to see his little baby girl since joining StarFleet a few years ago. _

_If it weren't for that, I would have totally invited myself over for some good ol' fashioned Southern comfort and food. In all honesty, there is no one I'd rather spend Christmas with than Bones...er, Len. But like hell will I ruin his Christmas just because I don't want to be alone on Christmas. He's been waiting too long to spend time with his girl. I don't need there to muck it all up. _

_Besides, I would have loved a father, hell just a parent, like Len. He's devoted and concerned and everything a parent should be toward his Joanna. There is no way that I could possibly ruin his best Christmas in years. I may be a douchebag at times, but I do have some standards. _

_So...I guess I just was wondering if you you had any tips or ideas for us who are going to be having a blue, blue, blue Chistmas. _

_Jeb _

* * *

_Dear Jeb,_

_Believe it or not, I do understand what it is like to spend Christmas of all holidays alone. It is not a pleasant feeling, knowing that while everyone else is all warm and happy with their families, you're sitting in a cold, dank bar drinking away your sorrows. Life was a bit rough for me back in the day. _

_I also know that family is a broad term that could encompass both just the very word itself or as you stated, the fellow crew members. As people grow up, the family shifts a bit but when it all gets boiled down, the heart of the family is still there. _

_I would advise you to at least check in on your mother, despite how much you apparently loathe her. She could be aching and hurting just as bad as you are...especially at this time of year. Trust me when I say no present is better than that reconciliation with a family member that you were once with odds with. Swing by her place and even if you only stay an hour, at least you could clear some of the bad air. _

_And who is to say that your friend, Len, doesn't want you to spend some of shore leave with him? What is to say that his Christmas wouldn't be complete with out a little bit of that "Peter Pan Syndrome"? All you have to do is ask. I get the feeling his bark is worse than his bite. _

_Sincerely,_

_Len_

_PS- Jim, I would love it if you would spend Christmas Day with Joanna and me. She'd love to meet you and I would love to make for you that comfort food you were raving about. _

_PPS- That means you are to see your mother Christmas Eve or I will take back my invitation. _


	5. Hopeless

**Author's Note: Throwback to the Original Series! =) **

**Yesh I know that it's not ALL Jim and Bones, but I'm going with the MAJORITY of the letters**

**Reviews are welcomed and LOVED almost as much as cookies.  
**

* * *

_Dear Horatio,_

_I can't believe I'm actually doing this...writing to you that is. I'm sure you get that a lot, but still. I never thought in a million years I would be writing in to get advice on guys. I have never had guy troubles before this. I guess it is because this particular guy that I am having troubles with has an affinity for anything with two legs and semi-humanoid form. _

_No, he hasn't been pestering me for anything other than to just...well, talk and do things that one might do with a friend. And that, Horatio, is where the problem is. _

_I see him with many different people...mostly for sex. He looks their way, while here I am looking his way. I see that all that...charm and flirtation and yeah even the sex is because he's harboring a hurt deeper than he wants people to see. I see it though, and it hurts me to see him like that. _

_It also hurts because he never really looked at me twice. Sure, when we first met he was a bit flirty. The only reason I never gave in was because I wanted to be someone special to him, not another conquest or one night stand. I'm wishing now that I did. Maybe I could have made a difference in that one night or however long a relationship might have lasted. _

_Horatio, I need to know what to do. I can't keep hurting myself by not confessing my feelings. At the same time, I don't want to drive him away (what with him being slightly commitment shy, from my perspective). _

_Sincerely,_

_Hopelessly in Love_

* * *

_Dear Hopeless,_

_First of all, nothing is totally hopeless. If there was no hope in love, then why do people fight so hard for it? It seems to me you haven't joined the fight yet, and are afraid to do so for very good reasons. Love can hurt worse than many things, and that is one fact I know better than most. _

_A wise man once said that with out risk there can be no reward. Confessing love is taking the big risk that your love is unrequited. But there's the catch. You will never know if you don't try. I think you're hurting yourself more by agonizing over this idiot than just to tell him how you feel. Let the proverbial chips fall where they may from that point onward. _

_There isn't much more to say than that. I wish you good luck in your pursuit of a certain Captain, Uhura. Show him what a real, lasting relationship is like. And if he does break your heart, I promise that you can have a good Southern meal and a steaming cup of hot chocolate and marshmallows. That and I will make him hurt pretty bad. It's what friends do. _

_So again, Good luck._

_Len_


	6. Mistakes

**Author's Note: Inspired by "Slipped Away" by Avril Lavigne. No character death. **

**Don't forget you can also leave a comment about what you would like a letter about, or a song you'd like to see made into a letter. **

**Reviews are loved! Oh, and this one is one of my favorites besides the _Christmas Blues_ and _Firework_.  
**

* * *

_Dear Horatio, _

_I made a terrible, unforgivable mistake. Then why the hell am I writing to you? Well, I want to attempt to make amends for what I did. I'd rather not go into the specifics, because it just hurts too much already and people just don't need to know how much of a douche-bag I really am, especially to the one I said "I love you more than I have ever loved anyone in my entire life." _

_Suffice it to say, I said somethings and did somethings that I am honestly and truthfully regretting right now. My lo- my significant other stormed out a week ago (after my damned treachery) and I haven't heard from him since. I fear he's gone somewhere I can't reach...somewhere he might not come back from. _

_I'm such a mess without him, especially knowing that I caused more pain to him than what I am feeling now. I was a moron and a slime bag for saying and doing what I did. I realize this now. And now it's too late to really do or say anything because he's long gone, and probably never coming back. _

_I'm writing you in hopes that you could help me and in hopes that he will read this...this sad excuse for an apology. _

_I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for causing the pain I said I'd never bring to you, for breaking that promise. I'm sorry for being the ass you always stated I was (even if most of those times you were joking). I am sorry that I broke your heart. For in breaking yours, I broke my own heart. _

_I'm sorry that I let you slip through the door with out a proper explaination, despite the fact you wouldn't have listened to me anyway because of how hurt and angry you were...and probably still are. _

_I just want you to know that I'm learning the hard way how different my sorry life is without you there to keep me straight...all because I let you slip through that damned door. All because I fell. All because I just...couldn't. I am sorry for everything and I miss you so much. _

_Here is to hoping that you might find it somewhere in you to forgive me...even if it's only a little bit. _

_A very contrite and miserable,_

_Je-Jim _

* * *

_Dear Je-Jim,_

_There really isn't much for me to tell you. You said your apology, and that is about all you can do for now. Whether this fellow chooses to act on the apology, or if he even read it will become apparent soon enough. _

_That being said, James Kirk...you are indeed a douche-bag, moron, asshole, slime bag and idiot. You shouldn't have done any of what you did. However, I too am sorry and am learning how different and how hard my life is without you here. You and I have had our wake-up calls, I'd say. _

_I went away trying to forget the pain, but at every turn I thought there might have been a reason if I had just such around to hear it. I didn't want to hurt anymore and so I ran. I wish I hadn't. The rest of the week I spent trying to figure out what to do with myself, that is until I got your letter._

_I forgive you, James Tiberius Kirk and I missed you more than you would think. I am coming home tonight. _

_Love,_

_Bones_

_PS- Don't ever do that again._

_PPS- I will always love you though, even though you prove your human with mistakes like that. _


	7. Valentine's Day

**Author's Note: Inspired by the fact Valentine's Day is here =)**

**AND I normally hate this day, but why let it ruin a good opportunity for a one-shot?**

* * *

_Dear Readers,_

_As St. Valentine's Day is upon us, I have been flocked with letters wondering this or that about the mysterious thing humans like to call "love" (and what others deem "illogical"). I figured rather than answer each individually, I'd do a catch all. That way I don't have to repeat myself and you all get your problems with love sorted out. _

_Note, I am an old geezer and have been around the block a few times. In other words, I know what I am talking about in case there are skeptics out there who think that someone like me would have no idea what their love problem is. That being said though, I am no love doctor. I know a lot about love but I am not the authority on it. All I can do is advise you according to what I know. _

_The first thing I think you all should know about love is that it's a choice. That's right. A choice. You choose to love someone. It's not all about the mushy gushy feelings. Feelings come and go; choices stick. That's why love is worth fighting for because of that choice you made to love the other person. However, I will say that feelings help aid those choices. It's also another reason why so many best friends become more than that. The fact it's a choice makes it hurt even more when love doesn't work out. Why? Someone is rejecting your choice and that always hurts. Got it? Good._

_Next is something we all know to be true. Love makes us to crazy and stupid shit. This is also something I know to be true since I have done some pretty weird things for the one I loved. It's hard to quantify this area, because crazy and stupid are relative terms that can mean slightly different things from one person to another. Words of warning: love also drives people crazy in both senses. _

_Finally and I hate to end on such a sour note (but many have written in about this), but love can make us hurt like hell. Love is the one thing that links souls. Once that bond is shattered...well, if you've ever suffered a break-up, death, or otherwise have love end, you know how that feels. It leaves you broken in so many ways. A broken heart can lead to so many dark things. My one solace to those going through this and have written in, from one broken person to another: "It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all" even if it doesn't feel like it at the time.  
_

_And kiddos, all of those things are the reasons that love is worth it; why love is worth the wait; why love is worth fighting for. I can honestly say that love is the greatest adventure out there. Yeah, even better than exploring the reaches of this universe.  
_

_So from me, have a Happy Valentine's Day!_

_Horatio_


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